


you are some kind of beautiful

by doctrpepper



Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: A very turbulent love story, Angst, Happy Ending?, I Made Myself Cry, I think?, I'm actually so romantic and then I do this lol, Just. Boys in love, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, The character death is. You know who, at least a positive ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-16
Updated: 2018-11-16
Packaged: 2019-08-24 09:44:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16637549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doctrpepper/pseuds/doctrpepper
Summary: Wally and Dick and saying "I love you"





	you are some kind of beautiful

**Author's Note:**

> i guess the way i write fic is slapping something out to some funky tunes in the middle of the night and making myself sad when i do this  
> anyway follow my [writing blog](https://pishuu.tumblr.com)

The last time Wally says “I love you” he's running to save the world. He's not fast enough he knows, and so does everyone else, but Dick can't do anything to stop him. He's going to run until he dies, because that's what he does, that's what all Flashes do. And so Dick clenches his fists and pretends tears aren't streaming down his cheeks as the Flash talks to him. It hurts, almost as much as the event itself, that Wally's last “I love you” comes to him secondhand. But come it does, and the Flash tells him how Wally's voice had cracked as he said it and how he was sorry he was so, so sorry, Dick, is there anything he can do? But Dick doesn't respond. He turns away from the Flash and turns away from everyone else and goes to his plane because he just has to get out of here. He doesn't want to talk, think, do anything. He feels numb. He wants to feel numb. The last he had seen of Wally was a yellow blur speeding out of the Watchtower and into the whirlwind that was the Flash and Impulse. And that was that. And then he was gone.

The last time Dick says “I love you”, he's lying in bed. Wally is deep asleep, sprawled across the bed in a mess, drool hanging from his mouth, and Dick looks at all of that and says “I love you.” It's really at that moment, in Wally's apartment at three in the morning half dressed and looking at Wally's sleeping face that Dick really, really realizes it. The realization is not exactly new, but it hits him just as hard. He feels regret for everything that had come between them and all the times he'd missed. He really had been an idiot. They both had. They _all_ had. But, he tells himself, there's time to fix things. And then he gets up the next morning to news the world is ending and then his world ends.

The first time Wally says “I love you” they're playing video games. This is not new. The words, most definitely. Dick almost doesn't register them, deeply involved in kicking Wally's ass as he is. Before he can say anything, Wally goes on. He goes on about how he'd had the feeling for such a long time but he'd been too scared to think about it, his dad, you see, and kids at school, and also he's and idiot and kind of a mess and oh look, now he's rambling and Dick please say something.

And Dick does. The first time Dick says “I love you” is right after Wally did but it's far from the first time he'd thought it. That had been years ago, when he'd woken up during a sleepover to Wally curling into him and he'd come to the realization that he was full blown in _love_. And sure, that had been scary and he'd worried about what it meant for their friendship so he'd locked that feeling away and tried to move on but sometimes Wally was just far too beautiful.

So, now, with Wally looking at him in awe, Dick says “I love you” out loud for the second time. He hadn't thought this was possible and clearly Wally hadn't either because they just stare at each other in shock and suddenly they're surging forward and meeting each other in the middle and grabbing hold and swearing to themselves they're never letting go and it feels so _good_ feels so _right._ Dick thinks to himself he's finally able to be true to himself. No more hiding, not from Wally. He's not going to mess things up. His heart feels like it's going to burst and he tells himself he's going to latch on and never let go.

The last time he says “I love you” to Wally's face, they're celebrating their anniversary. He hands Wally a gift, something simple but he'd made it himself and he'd put a lot of thought into it and he smiles and says “I love you” and Wally's eyes fill with tears and he smiles big, in that way Dick knows means he's truly happy. And Dick feels his heart swell too, because whenever Wally smiles at him like _that_ , he can't help but smile right back. They're both happy and they're both feeling good and they love each other. And so they say it. Wally says it a lot, but Dick holds his close to his heart and so every time he says it he really, truly, means it. When he says it, he's saying he's filled with so much love he feels as if he's about to burst, everything inside screaming love so loudly he just has to say it out loud. And here, on their anniversary, watching Wally open up his gift with one hand and entwine their fingers with the other, Dick truly feels like he's drowning in love. He hopes this moment never ends. But, as all good moments do, end it does.

The last time Wally says “I love you” to Dick's face, Dick is walking out the door. Things had been building up to this for quite some time, and it's not just Wally, it's Bruce and just everything in Dick's life, but Wally seems to think it's his fault anyway. And it's not. But Dick needs to go and he knows if he looks back at Wally's tear streaked face and listens to him begging, pleading, crying out, then he'll turn around and stay and he also knows it'll tear him apart inside. He needs this, he tells himself. He needs a clean break from everything. He just needs a break. The life he's starting to live is not something he wants to be living and he needs to go. And that's not to say there's no good parts, one of which is still calling after him right behind him, but if he tries to keep any part of his old life, he knows he'd just get sucked back in, and he needs to leave. So he makes the hardest decision of his life and closes the door behind him and feels something inside him die.

Dick thinks it's going to be the last time he says “I love you” when he's watching Wally pace back and forth, back and forth, stressed and angry. He's mad at Dick, because of the mission, because of Artemis and Kaldur, but also because of when Wally said “I love you” and Dick didn't say it back. He'd agreed to work with Dick initially because he'd known something needed to be done, but he doesn't speak to Dick about anything that doesn't have to do with the mission. He keeps it professional but won't even look Dick in the eyes. And Dick feels a pang of hurt, regret, lots of things, but pushes it down. They have a mission to focus on, and he's always been good at forcing his feelings away. No time to reminisce on the past or what could have been. But Wally is still so beautiful, even stressed and angry, and Dick watches him scrunch up his face and knows he made the biggest mistake of his life. But it's too late now. And so he stares at the ground and he says “I love you” as quietly as he can because he does, he loves so hard it _hurts_ , but he can't say it anymore. He's lost that right. And he feels ready to burst, as he always does. But all he can do is cherish the time he has with Wally now, as short as it is, as big as the rift between them is, because it's all he has, now.

Dick thinks Wally's going to say “I love you” when it's night and they're lying together in bed. Neither of them had been expecting this. Dick had come on a whim and Wally had let him in on a whim and they were just supposed to talk and obviously something was wrong with them because where they had once been able to talk through everything they didn't say much of anything and now they were here, in bed. Dick doesn't regret this, though. It's all just as soft as ever and just as perfect as ever and he really had missed this, but, obviously, this isn't all he missed. He thinks they're going to talk about it after, but Wally just smiles at him and asks if he's back for good, and Dick smiles back and says he'll try, and that's that. He really doesn't deserve Wally. And so he waits as they talk of meaningless things, waits to hear “I love you” because Wally used to say it so much, slip it in so often, but it never comes. Wally just yawns and turns over to go to bed. And that's that.

So Dick says it instead.

It's not until the next night, back in Wally's apartment but so, so alone this time, that he finds the last instance of Wally saying “I love you”. It's a letter; he'd found it while digging through some of Wally's things. He's not sure why he's even here, or why he's looking through Wally's stuff as if he could find some secret place Wally was hiding, but he finds the letter buried in Wally's messy desk anyway. He feels bad for reading it, but no one is going to stop him, and he's desperate for something, anything, of Wally's, and, well, it's addressed to him. So he opens it and reads. And his heart, already aching, feels like it tears in half. Because apparently Wally had been missing him just as much, hurting just as much, had been filled with so much love he'd felt he was going to burst, but where Dick had turned away and pushed away his feelings, Wally had embraced them. As always, Dick thinks. He hadn't changed, much. Everything about him that made Dick fall so deeply in love in the first place was just as it was the first day he realized it. And so, as Dick tips the ring out of the envelope and onto his hand to get a closer look, he realizes he needs to fight for Wally just as hard as Wally had always been fighting for him. He'd messed up in the worst way possible, but he needed to make it right. They'd both thought there would be time to fix things, they'd taken the first step but hadn't taken enough steps and now Wally is gone. But, Dick thinks as he curls his hand around the ring and brings it close to chest, now he's going to do anything he can to bring Wally back, even if that means fighting death itself.

He has so many more “I love you"s to say.

**Author's Note:**

> i always work to the tune of music and i made a [playlist](https://open.spotify.com/user/12124707848/playlist/1KB8n5traazf0GFTbox9XY?si=ReuuNIZUR1-z9yBYCOwP2Q) for this fic. i picked out every song carefully and im probably going to keep listening so maybe ill have some more fics in this verse focusing on specific moments. maybe. we'll see!


End file.
